The Atomic Bitchwax, 3
The Thieves, Tales From The White Line

Though not as heavy as Stoner Rock kings, Fu Manchu, and as authentic as Nebula, The Atomic Bitchwax still manage to pack a good punch. If radio actually played this stuff, ABW may be in the charts with “You Oughta Know”. Check out the Prog Rock soloing here, these boys don’t waste any time. Every song has a manic energy to it, particularly the instrumental, “Force Field”. You can bet this stuff is twice as heavy when they take it to the stage.

The fact that TAB cover Deep Purple’s “Maybe I’m A Leo” situates them as either cynics or unflappable keepers of the Classic Rock flame. My bet is both. Odd how well it fits into their overall sound. Purple bassist Roger Glover usually spends his time tinkering and reissuing his old bands better records and it’d be a shame if he decided to sue the hell out of these kids for copyright infringement. The problem with covers, though, especially if they are done note-for-note is you run the risk forcing the listener to crave the original songl…and that’s exactly what happening here. I’d be surprised if I make it to the end of this CD without reaching for a copy of Deep Purple’s Fireball or Made In Japan.

Speaking of Deep Purple, I once knew a woman who claimed to have “partied” with the band’s roadies many years back. Normally I wouldn’t put too much faith into a line like that but she seemed the type, if you know what I mean. The story unfolded a bit more: she and a friend spent much of the night hiding under a motel room table while the roadies played Russian Roulette with an antique revolver. Now that I can believe…you should’ve seen her wide and unfocused eyes when retelling that story. Damn, that’s funny. After that I became obsessed with collecting more Deep Purple stories (I was like Alan Lomax doing field research) and asked everyone who was of that age if they had any good experiences. No one had anything for me except Mitch. Seems that he and his girlfriend and another couple attended a Deep Purple concert in Mexico City but they never saw the band. Their female friends were attracting way too much attention for the guys around them. “We kinda had to run for our lives,” he chuckled.

Back to TAB. 3 is marred by bad production. Much too compressed for this style of rock power; it’s pretty much all guitar and vocals. The bass is way in the back and the drums sound paper-thin. Yet that may be the only complaint on this one. A bigger sound didn’t seem to be a problem for The Thieves who play a less Stoner and more middle of the road brand of Rock.
Their press release goes about describing the band as “AC/DC on acid, Pink Floyd on uppers, The Who on a pub crawl…” (yawn) none of which makes any sense. That’s just a clue that their own label isn’t sure what to make of them. Bad sign. The Thieves are nothing like the above mentioned bands on drugs. (What?) They play a pedestrian version of rock and roll that we’ve all heard before but their angle is three part harmony vocals. The CDs’ title may be a veiled reference to the their fierce cocaine habit that will soon break up their band as each member crawls deeper into delusional paranoia and self hatred. I’m making that up, but you never know theses days.

There are some catchy things here and there. “Oh No” is a good swing and “You Got It East” should get mentioned because the song’s chorus structure is a direct copy of David Bowies’ “Heroes”. “Everynite” is promising as is the title track…but nothing really happens. Instead, Tales Form The White Line is a dozen ordinary songs thrown together in the guise of a solid CD. I don’t even get the felling that these guys are having any fun, either which makes me wonder what why they’re even doing this. But don’t let me discourage you from snapping up this little nugget; I’m being paid a sick amount of money to give you my lame-ass opinion. If you like Modern Rock without a lot of doodads getting in the way, then by all means, have at it.

Tell you what, if The Atomic Bitchwax and The Thieves play a double bill together, I would check it out because I’m sure both of these bands are twice as good on stage as they are in the studio. - Andrew Lau